Sweet Home Alabama

Last night I learned that my ex husband who is estranged, and strange in many a way, has married his Russian Mail Order Bride; who has not yet seen 30.  He, I remind you, is 66 and has three stints in place.  At first, I must admit I was shocked yet somehow all the hoop-la and insanity once again validated my belief that everyone from Alabama is a character.  We are different beyond understanding and yet so totally real that sometimes it is almost scary for me.   I don't just say this from reading To Kill A Mockingbird or Sweet Home Alabama.  I am related, by marriage, you know to Harper Lee and Truman Compote.  I can trace my ancestors to the Lee's of Virginia and the slaughter in Chattanooga. My great grandfather cut off the limbs of Confederate troops and lost his way home in North Carolina.   I am of Scottish descendants who came to Alabama in a covered wagon.  I don't base this proposition or wildness/weirdness.  Its not based on Hank Williams songs or Crazy in Alabama movies or books.  I base this on the fact that I don't know anyone who was born in Alabama, grew up there,  who celebrated the South and the Confederacy who is not a nut .  It is not based on the fact that everyone I know back home still has something with a Confederate Flag somewhere, hidden or not.  I say this because all those same crazy ass people back there in Alabama, love their home.  They love the stupidity, the bullheadedness, the complete utter disregard for reality or even the fact that they live in a double wide.  They love Alabama/Auburn Football.  They love the Bear and Shug.   They love mosquitoes and palmettos bushes.   They love the South.  They drink sweet tea and Coke even if they are diabetic.  They love Sweet Home Alabama.  Yesterday in the mist of my come-apart a woman from Ohio walked into the little  store where I work in the North Georgia Mountains and said, "My gosh, you still have Confederate Flags on stuff".  I smiled at her in her complete utter ignorance and said "Yes, we do.  We still hope to God that we win".   She did not buy anything.  I did not care.  For I made a decision that I am going home.

Becoming a Grand-something

Since Christmas, I have applied myself to discovering a new way of dealing with my life.  For years I have read all the self help books, studied the Bible and never missed Oprah ( until she decided to support Obama).  Still I have found myself, divorced, again, and living in the foothills of Appalachia were ignorance and dental hygienic run rampant.  In January as part of my New Year's Resolution, I resigned from an in-effective volunteer job and began to read everything I could find on changing my life, broadening my horizons and selling my house.  I have downloaded every self-help book, re-framed from dating (on-line) and prayed.  During that time, my strong, resilient big brother has died and I have found another "non committing man".  You ask, "How in the name of God do you meet a man and not date?". My reply is that it is easy.  I have made a life of it.  Almost by chance I heard a sermon from "Joel Osteen, TV Let Me Tell You How To Live" and read "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" all within 7 days of each other.  Neither one could have moved me, but together they shattered my resistance and got my attention; coupled with the passing of my brother and my 6lst birthday.  I am not about to tell you how to change, live or even stay alive but I am going to explore the possibilities that have opened to me and I am going to share them with you.  My brother is the best example of becoming all new that I have ever seen.  He became the man he wanted to be for his children, in becoming a saint to his grandchildren.  They called him "Grandbuddy" because that is what he became to them.   A wonderful friend, a great supporter and an inspiration to all those precious grandchildren and great-grandchildren who came to know him  My brother, Buddy, was not a sweetheart, not a pushover, not a man who made great promises or flattered you. But, he became a new creature in God to his grandchildren.  If all I ever am in this world is a good grandparent, can you even image the difference I will make in the world.  Thank you, Buddy, for helping to point me in the right direction. And please, help me find a good man!